Resilience is the ability to bounce back from failure or setbacks. However, it's something that we, as parents, refuse to develop in our children because we don't want to see them fail, or suffer, or experience defeat. Yet, without these experiences, there would be no opportunity to develop and learn this valuable skill.
Kenneth Ginsburg, M.D., M.S. Ed is a leading author and speaker on the development of resilience in children and teens. In this video he shares his insight and research - WATCH
Young people will live up to or down to the expectations we set for them. They need
adults who believe in them unconditionally and hold them to the high expectations of being
compassionate, generous, and creative.
Competence: When we notice what young people are doing right and give them opportunities to develop important skills, they feel competent. We undermine competence when we don't allow young people to recover themselves after a fall.
Confidence: Young people need confidence to be able to navigate the world, think outside the box, and recover from challenges.
Connection: Connections with other people, schools, and communities offer young people the security that allows them to stand on their own and develop creative solutions.
Character: Young people need a clear sense of right and wrong and a commitment to integrity.
Contribution: Young people who contribute to the well‐being of others will receive gratitude rather than condemnation. They will learn that contributing feels good, and may therefore more easily turn to others, and do so without shame.
Coping: Young people who possess a variety of healthy coping strategies will be less likely to turn to dangerous quick‐fixes when stressed.
Control: Young people who understand privileges and respect are earned through demonstrated responsibility will learn to make wise choices and feel a sense of control.
[The 7 Cs are an adaptation from The Positive Youth Development movement. Rick Little and colleagues at The International Youth Foundation first described the 4 Cs of confidence, competence, connection, and character as the key ingredients needed to ensure a healthy developmental path. They later added contribution because youth with these essential 4 characteristics also contributed to society. The additional two C’s – coping and control –allow the model to both promote healthy development and prevent risk.]